3.18 Ranked: every bar at Sydney Contemporary

Transcript

Okay. I’m gonna crack one of these lovely Port Tom’s Negroni spritzes. It sounds so yum. Sounds great. Sounds so good. And you were against them, but then you tried one, you were like, yum.

Yeah. I had to eat my hat on that one. What were you about to do? This episode sponsored by Port Tom’s. Thanks Port Tom’s. You know, I was actually, it was weird. I was at this cocktail bar, like a little bit of a corporate one, PS40, Pop Soda 40. PlayStation 40. I gotta take you there. I wonder if you’ll like it. We had some pretty good food,

but they were just like throwing these at everyone. Really? It was like sponsored by like Bizarro and they were just handing them out and everyone was fucking pissed. It was really cool. I’ve never been to a cocktail before. That’s cool. Where all the drinks were free. Yeah. What the fuck? I might have to take you one time. It’s actually a pretty cute potential city date spot. If you’re like

linking with like a corporate person who’s like, I got to meet you after work. This is like, it’s like the arty side of corporate bars. Yeah. It’s like right by like Pitt Street and shit. Cute. But yeah, it was pretty good, man. Sounds pretty good. Yeah. Did you eat anything good this week? Did I eat anything good this week?

Yeah. No. Cool. I’ve been working for 20 hours a day. You’ve just been eating like handouts from both of your jobs. Yeah. I’ve been eating whatever’s left over from a butcher at the end of the day. Cooked, obviously. Thank you. And whatever’s left over from like various photo shoots and TikTok events at the end of the day.

Funny mix of things. Yeah. We’re going to have like better Mexican tonight. I’m a cook for us. Better Mexican than like you can probably get in 90% of restaurants in Sydney. Legit. I’m like, I’m pretty confident. Yeah. Like I can back that up. Yeah. Zambrero keeps calling us. We’re not picking up the phone.

Tex-Mex in Newtown keeps calling us. We’re not answering the calls. Although… Guzmany Gomez, they’re fucking texting us. Please, please pick up the phone. We’re not answering. We’re just like, no, I don’t. Apparently, Guzman used to do a barramundi burrito. Did you ever have that? And they just took it off the menu. This sounds lovely. No, I never had it. Apparently, it was real good. Like people are upset about it that it’s off the menu.

I’m not that hyped about Guzman. I reckon Zambrero is better. But you know what? Guzman is good, but then I’m like upset that I’m starting to believe that it’s genuinely good. Yeah. It’s not genuinely good. It is genuinely good. It’s okay. It’s like probably better than average takeout, but then Zambrero is just like effortlessly… We’ll try it together. Yeah. Yeah. I’d love to try it.

Yeah. It’s really good. Because I haven’t heard that. Although I have one hot tip. I was talking to a bona fide US citizen, and I was like, brother, lay it on me. Where’s the Mexican at in this city? And he was like, Baja Cantina in Glebe, which I’ve always walked past and I’ve never been there, but… Yeah. One of my Glebe friends told me about that.

Oh yeah. Did they write it? I don’t remember. They were just like, you should go. Okay. TBD. TBD to be decided. Write in with your favorite Mexican restaurants in Sydney. And tell us what you put on your home tacos. I just blew Aiden’s head off with my gun. Shredded lettuce? Do you go shredded lettuce? I do. Do you like a hard taco or a soft taco?

Beep. I really do want to know what hung up listeners are out there eating, what they like to eat, how you nourish your body and soul in these tough, dark times. You can’t talk anymore because I already blew your head off with my gun. Send me a personal message at aiden.laughlin at gmail.com.

It’s aiden.laughlin.com. Yeah. That’s my email. You want me to leave that in? Really? Can you just bleep that part? Okay. Yeah. I bleep that part. Yeah. Cool, man. So, what did we do today, Aiden?

Say the big thing first. The biggest thing. Yeah. That we did today. We went to the shops. No. We went to the Sydney Contemporary Art Fair. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Okay. We just got back from Sydney Contemporary Art Fair.

Yeah. Which was interesting. At one point, it was like you, me, friend of ours. I was like, is this fun? Is anyone having fun? And we were all like, nah, like I wouldn’t call it fun. Yeah. And I think that. Yeah. That’s definitely. That sums it up very well. Yeah. Yeah. But I wasn’t even like disappointed because I knew what it was going to be like going into it.

Yeah. I wasn’t disappointed. Yeah. It’s not really like, it’s not really a fun place to be. And it’s not really like a good way to engage with art. Like mostly we were just like overwhelmed. Yeah. But it is cool. And like, I’m glad we went, not in like a dutiful way, but it’s like, it’s a unique way to see art.

Yeah. And it’s kind of like hype. And we definitely like, we made it fun. We made it fun. It was dazzling. And we like, we kind of had to keep our wits about us and not spend too much time in one section. Cause like, fuck, how long does like your attention span really last for in these things? I said, it was like going to one of those big European museums where it’s like, you’re fucking tired by the time you get through the third room.

And then there’s still five more rooms of like Jesus and mother Mary. And you’re just like knackered to all of our listeners who just got back from Europe. You know exactly what I’m talking about. Yeah. Um, the, there was a couple of things that we’ll like get around to talking about, which we sort of had something to say about, but overall it was like another hit job.

We like went in feeling like we needed to make fun of something again, just cause. Yeah. And it’s like, that’s how we do very much a spectacle. Like, obviously we’re not, like you say, like everyone knows what they’re getting when they go to a show like that. Yeah. Like, yeah, I agree. I wasn’t disappointed. But yeah, Keen, like I was like, what did I say to you at one point? I was like in a different context, like a bunch of these works are really good. Like no doubt.

In their own little gallery. It would have been sick. So it’s like medium is the message. Like if you fucking throw a grenade at my brain and make me see a thousand artworks and listen to 50 people talk about how this painting is like definitely going to appreciate it. And like, it’s okay. It’s chill. Like the artist is only 37. I heard some of those comments. It was great.

Why don’t we do a quick, before we get into like the art stuff. Yeah. We’ll push that back to the end of the episode. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let’s touch on the actual important stuff. Yeah. I want a quick roundup of like the little funny moments and like the little interactions we had. Okay. Do we have to disclose? We were like hung up, did not pay for entry into.

Yeah. True. So we should say upfront, like friend of the pod, you know who you are. Uh, got us some press passes. Wink, wink. Uh, so we fucking walked around like a couple of important motherfuckers. Yeah. And, uh, it, it means, it does mean that we had a little bit of a different like lens. We had a different Instagram filter on today, which was free shit to do in Sydney instead of things to do in Sydney under 50 bucks.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So we were definitely going about it like, well, now we’ve got $36 to spend on the shit wine and the poor Tom’s gin. In the Campari bar. In the Campari bar. All right. I want a quick run to. Okay. Let’s go through all the bars. What were the bars? There was like the wine bar that we first saw. Yeah. And then there was the one that you sent me the picture of just now. That’s two.

Dufresne, which was like, like a summery champagne bar. Yeah. For sashaying across. Uh-huh. And then there was, uh, that’s two. Then there was Campari bar. Campari. Yep. Like full sponsored Campari bar. Yeah. Which was just dead quiet. It was like there to sign at the front, please queue here. And it’s just no one in the bar.

It was midday. Uh, then there was the poor Tom’s gin, which we haven’t counted in this list yet. The hard, the like cool, the smoldering, there was a smoldering bar. He’s like, they were all the bar stuff were bored. They were all giving us these really heavy pours and like quite like matey service. Cause I think it just seemed like they had really like prepared for like heaps of drinking.

Like the fair wasn’t even that busy. Like the farmer’s market was kind of going harder than the fair. Like true. True. Yeah. To be honest. Yeah. Yeah. It was, it was bustling today. Yeah. Um, and then maybe one more bar. I don’t know, whatever. I’ve lost track. There was another one. There was heaps of bars. Plenty of booze to go around and not many dry mouths to, no, that many dry whistles.

And then just quick shout out. I fucking just walked right into the VIP section for a bit. Nice. And I was like, who’s in here? Like, who am I going to meet? Who am I going to see? Who am I going to pap? Who’s going to pap me? Am I VIP in this scene? And I just sat in there for like five minutes and there were no characters. There was like one model, like looking around, like trying to almost like really trying to like either recognize someone or like draw attention to themselves.

Yeah. Which was pretty cool. To see and to be seen. Exactly. And then, but to be honest, like the most important person in the fucking VIP room was this like little ginger three-year-old who was receiving medical attention after like we saw him fall over like pretty hard, like 10 minutes before at the gin bar.

And I was like, oh shit, like he’s in here right now. Yeah. But yeah, the VIP was just like a shit cafe. Yeah. Like, or just like not even booze, nothing fancy, like crappy decor. And then like a guy with a huge lens, like trying to make it look fucking funny, like trying to take photos of the room. Yeah. But like, that’s the whole thing is that you’re in the room and all the regular civilians are not allowed in the room.

Yeah. You don’t need anything in the room. What are you going to do to actually like legit get invited to the VIP room? I think you have to pay like a hundred bucks. Oh fuck off. You have to get a fancy pass. That’s it. I think. That’s the dumbest shit. Nah, it’s like you, wait, that could be it. They were selling, I’m pretty sure they were selling some kind of fancy ticket. What do you want in your VIP room?

You want a guest list. It’s like you’re getting like a flight to like Canberra and getting like first class tickets to Canberra. It’s like, come on, bro. Yeah, true. You’re going to be in the air for like, oh, like to Melbourne. It’s like, you’re going to be in the air for an hour. Like shut the hell up. Yeah. Okay. I’m not upset about that, but it’s just like, yeah. Some people. Maybe that’s not even how it works, but if that would be the way that it worked.

Yeah, totally. Yeah. It was a very family oriented day today. It was a lot of little kids. Everyone was very well behaved. I must say. Yeah. Because maybe, you know what? It was pretty more fun for the kids than for a lot of us adults. True. You know? Yeah. It was a bit dead, wasn’t it? Like, no, hey, but it was a bit dead. Like there wasn’t that much like, even like, oh my God, look how rich they are.

Or like, yeah. It’s in glamour. Like it was pretty toned down. Yeah. Everything was pretty, yeah. Pretty cash, wasn’t it? Yeah. Like I live right by. So like this week when I’ve been walking home and stuff, I’ve been seeing like the crowds at like the events. Like I think there’s been like drinks and stuff. And like, there was like some really fucking poorly named NFT talk called sizzle or fizzle

for like 50 bucks. And I was just like, and then like, it’s funny. I have to like. The answer, actually, I can tell you now the answer is fizzle. Yeah. Maybe it seems like that way. There’s a little lane. I don’t know if you’ve walked past, but like on the way from Wilson street to Redfern, they’re like doing some kind of like construction. So the only way to get through that like street is this tiny little narrow street.

So you have to like literally go shoulder to shoulder. Yeah. Single file. Single file. And like, sometimes people like, you know, don’t want to stop and let you pass. And it was cool last night. Like there were a bunch of rich, rich, rich oldies coming out of the show. And one of them, we had gone to Rara and I was like carrying my takeaway noodles home.

And it was like a man and his wife, both about 60, like quite dolled up. And like, we were about to leave the little like fucking tunnel and it was like our right of way. And this woman just like barrels in and then like her husband steps back and it’s like very gentlemanly. And he’s got this fucking thick, like Aussie tradie voice. And he’s like, wouldn’t want you to drop your tucker.

And I’m like, oh shit. Like what the fuck? It was so Aussie. It really tripped me out. But yeah, so I’ve been like seeing the vibe like every night and it’s been a very like pretty old, like 60 plus. It’s very white, very like black tie kind of vibe. Interesting.

For the night events. That’s what I’ve noticed. And what are the events? It’s just to piss up with the prices and arts shown. Yeah. And that’s like, there’s some talks. The biggest art bar. And it has more exclusivity. I think the first night was like collectors only. Ooh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You had a picture of like a little AI gadget, like deciding if you were a collector or an

artist, which I thought was kind of cool. Actually. That’s kind of cool. Cause it’s like, they’re, they’re like allowing themselves a little self-referential fun. Like that’s true. Good work. Carriage work. Do you think that’s a pretty accurate depiction of who would go to that? Like artists and collectors. It’s not really the type of thing that like, you know, someone who would maybe go to the

MCA probably wouldn’t go to Sydney contemporary. Like it’s a bit. Yeah. Oh no. If you went to, yeah, there’s a bit of a van. Look, there’s not that much to do in Sydney. So you’re going to find yourself at like every gallery eventually, if you’re kind of interested in art, but there’s definitely like sort of ranges of the spectrum, right? Like if you’re a fucking 65 year old, who’s let’s say just retired off of like a career

of working at a news corp, let’s say, and you’ve got tons of cash that you’re just like trying to do something with before you fucking shuffle off. Eat shit. Then you probably don’t go to like, you know, you probably don’t go to the sick galleries that we go to. Like, give me one, like fucking tiles. Yeah. You don’t go and fucking play chess after a visit to tiles.

You definitely do not do that. But you do go to like the MCA and like get a fucking little boner for some cool art. And then you go and like actually buy something maybe at carriage works today. Yeah. Can we do a quick bone account? Just because you said the word. Oh yeah. I like boner hunting. I counted two boners. One painted boner and one described boner in the wall text.

What was that? It was a Dale Frank. Yeah. It was a Dale Frank, like a big abstract work. And it was like, what did it say? Do you want me to read it off from my phone? I just recall it. Okay. It was like, Darren enjoyed moving, like being a professional mover as in moving people’s houses. Cause like he would sometimes get a boner carrying a wardrobe up the stairs or something.

Yeah. Like carrying it from the back. And it was like, and he enjoyed it. And he enjoyed it. Like secretly. Secretly. Yeah. Pretty cool. Yeah. We were saying like. $9,000. We were like, I was like, boners don’t get depicted that much. And then our mate was like, no, there’s heaps of boners or you. Yeah. But I was like, no, there’s heaps of flaccid dicks. Yeah. You know, but like, but like frothing genitalia, like aroused genitalia.

Bro, that dick is frothing. Mine gets, I wouldn’t say it’s not a froth, but it’s a, you know. Yeah. I know.

I do not know listeners.

Anyway. Oh yeah. I wanted you to, I wanted to say one, um, without getting into the art. Cause we’re saving the art. We’re saving that for later. There was this like dumb little weird part where it was like, you had to go into like a cubicle to see the work. They’d like used every part of their allotted, like this show.

Are you talking about the cube? Uh, yeah, there is the tetra. Tesseract. There’s a tesseract where I’m describing that little nook room where it was like, whatever happened, this gallery, like you get your space or whatever you pay for your space. And then like, they were like, we’re also going to use this last room as like our storage room. Like I had everyone’s bags in it and they were like charging their iPhone.

Yeah. But then they’d also hung work. So you were like in their storeroom looking at work. Yeah. And yeah, I wanted to just that we had like a funny interaction. Yeah. I wanted you to tell that. Okay. So yeah, we’re like following along the wall. And the wall gets like sort of turned around on itself. And suddenly you’re in a room with like an unlabeled cube on the ground.

And then like, yeah, you’re back. Like the, you know, the attendance bags and like, yeah, we’re charging an iPhone. And then like a couple more like artists who turns out we’re like, yeah, right. Famous artists, like little did we know. And then like the prices and little stickers and stuff. And it’s like, we’re kind of like, we’re having a laugh. We’ve already had like most of our rosés at this point.

And I didn’t have breakfast. So I was feeling a little bit boozy. And we’re having a laugh, like we’re drawing attention to ourselves for sure. So she comes over. She’s like, what’s going on over here? And she says, are you guys artists? Like kind of in a knowing slash accusatory, but no judgment. She’s like, you’re not collectors. Yeah, you’re obviously, yeah, you’re not collectors.

So you must be artists. And we say, no, we’re journalists. We’re art journalists. And she goes, surely not. Behind her mask. She’s like, surely not. Shakes her head. And she says, what do you actually do? And I say, we tape an art podcast. It’s called hungup.au on Instagram. And she’s like, she didn’t really like that.

Then she started giving us a credential. She’s like, this is this person. This is this person. Like, do you know them? Yeah, it was all like, it was almost like, well, if you were. Yeah, you know this person. You would know who this is. And it’s just like a painting of like the bush. Like nothing spent. I don’t know. It was like, all right, guys. And then I was like, I was like, why are we fighting? I was like, I love this work. Like we were talking about some really cool, like pretty realistic store lives that I feel

like pretty captivated by. Yeah, those were gorgeous. But yeah, that was funny. That was our little like anti-authority moment. I definitely think we were taking. The piss. Yeah, we’re taking the piss. I don’t think we’re being disrespectful. Maybe. Okay. We were actively making fun of some work. But like we were doing what the show set us up to do, which was to get drunk and like

walk around. We’re like, let’s hang out with our friends or each other and have fun. And it’s going to be at the outfit. And art will be there. Yeah. Kind of thing. Yeah. That’s like what we were saying. That’s what we’re always all about. Yeah. But you have to go off about it. Elizabeth Queen. The Queen. The Queen. The Queen must be spoken about. The Queen is sad.

The Queen is sad. The Queen is sad. Don’t even ask me a question. Yes. I’m going to answer you the question. Okay. Ask me the question. Be brave. Be strong. Ask me the question. Don’t be afraid. Our audience is cool. I’m brave. You can handle it. Okay. Yeah. Matt is now bracing himself. He’s taking his final sip of wine.

Because I’m going to ask him. Last sip before I get cancelled. Last sip before you get. Last taste of freedom. You get sniped. So like. However you feel about the Queen. Oh. Actually. Just one more quick detail. The night of. Friday night. While I was waiting for my table at Rara.

I ducked across to the Scarlet Weasel. Let’s get our. Let’s get our time last year. It was Friday. Wasn’t it? She died on Friday. Today’s Saturday. Yeah. Okay. She died on Friday. I’m pretty sure. Yeah. Yeah. Doesn’t fucking matter. The day she died. Yeah. I went down the weasel. Yeah. Which is like. But. But the weasel is like. A British bar.

And. That was kind of beautiful. I just sat there. Was it going off? Was it like. It was really. It was sad. They had like. The disco ball lighting. They had like. Down music. And. There was like. A British group beside me. Like three or four punters. Yeah. And they were just like. Speculating on.

What happens now. Yeah. And they were just like. How do I go on? Having like semi racist takes. About like Megan Markle. Okay. Like she’s fucking crazy. Yeah. Yeah. All right guys. Maybe whatever. Yeah.

But yeah. So basically the question I wanted to. Ask you. Matt C. Tass. Is. I mispronounced your last name. A little bit. Yeah. A little bit. Slightly. It’s like. Yeah. A lot of people. Or like some people. Were like. Getting real mad about. People being. Sad. That the queen died.

They were like. You should celebrate it. Because. She was evil. Hmm. Okay. What was your feeling. When you saw one of those posts. Like what went through your. Brain and your body. Uh. My feeling was like. We have this reaction to. Literally everything that happens. Like everything has to have some kind of like. Like outrage. To do like well.

In. Yeah. I’m just like. I’m just fucking sick of like. Like I don’t care about. Reading politics. In short form. On people’s stories. And posts. And shit like that. Like. I’ll fucking do politics. In the way I live my life. And I’ll like. Understand. Like from. Like the general. Like factual news.

That’s like. Available to me. What’s going on. But. Beyond that. Like. I just. I can’t participate. In that. Whatever the fuck that is. Like. So. My brain shuts down. When I read that shit. I’m like. Next story. Like whatever. Yeah. Yeah. But I’ll tell you like. Here’s like a cute little like. Aside. Like. Like. Hearing about her. Dying.

Like. Cast my mind back. To like. Watching things like. Lady Diana. Like. Dying. And like. Royal news. With my grandparents. When I was a kid. And then it made me think. Like. My grandma. My grandma’s old. Like. It kind of made me like. Miss my grandma. And then like. Think about how. Precious life is. So. There you go. Fuck you.

You’re actually not allowed. To make that historical connection. With your own history. You should feel guilty about that. Well. I’m not on Instagram anymore. So. Hell yeah. I don’t have to feel guilty about anything. Jokes aside. That’s actually very sweet. Yeah. It’s like. Yeah. Like. It reminded me of watching TV. With the old folks. I like it. Hell yeah dude. Good answer.

Good answer. You get to live another day. Yes. In this world. Oh my god. Thank god. Okay. Quick. Jump into the art. Yep. Let’s go. We need to cut. Because we need some names. Okay. We should name the artists. We’ll be right back. Are we back on?

We’re rolling baby. Say hello. Hello. Alright. Now we’re going to talk about the art. Matt really liked a mirror with a skull. Speak on it. It’s like Donald Trump getting elected president. It’s like the Mona Lisa. It’s also like the Mona Lisa. You following me so far?

Yeah. I’m with you. Okay. It’s like it’s like kind of perfect for the day. It’s like we’re at this big glammy sparkly show. Like literally dazzled by LED lighting. Like perfectly constant lighting. But when you open your phone up to it. You can see that there’s like a rolling shutter effect that happens. And it’s like spooky.

There’s like tons of people. And then the thing that gets the kind of like best response in terms of like people holding their phones up to take pictures or something. Is like a very clever trick of like perspective and light. And like the whole experience of the artwork is kind of a visual trick.

I took a video of it and I’ll add it to the thing. But it was kind of perfect. It was like that’s what gets the attention. And like. Wait. Describe the trick. Because I just said a mirror and a skull. But like. Okay. So it’s like there’s like an object in front of a convex mirror. And the way. It’s like a one you see in like security mirrors.

Right. Where it’s like on the corner. Because it shows you. Because it’s the opposite. Oh it’s the opposite. It’s concave. Sorry. Right. Right. Right. Right. Yeah. So it’s concave. So it’s like. It’s like the mirror is like bellied away from me. Like the furthest part of the mirror is right in the middle. Whereas the parking lot mirror. First part is on the outsides. And the way that ends up looking is like.

There’s this like skull image that’s like floating around the gallery. And obviously. Like unfortunately. Classically. Maybe beautifully. Or whatever. Like it’s just like all you see is like a bunch of people holding up their phones to it. Like duh obviously. But the skull is this kind of apparition in this like sort of funny gallery world.

There were spots where like you couldn’t see it. Like if you’re too close to it there was no skull. Yes. Because it’s all about like focal point and stuff. Like it’s like a really beautiful like application of like what we. Like a sort of simple like understanding of like optics. And like fucking with your. Literally with your biology. Like I’ve never had such a physiological reaction to an artwork before.

Where literally my eyes are like sick. Like I’m not happy to look at it for more than 15 seconds. It’s like upsetting to look at. But also mesmerizing and like beautiful. Yeah. And then. It’s also. Sorry. It’s also interesting that it could. Because you could. You could make that kind of stuff happen with all sorts of digital. Like I just blast you in the face with like a stroke.

But it’s lovely because it is so. Yeah. You know. It’s so simple. It’s not. It’s not doing that. Yeah. It’s analog. It’s offline. Which I dig. Yeah. And then. Yeah. It’s obviously a reference to the ambassadors. Where it’s like. The skull in the room. You can look at it. The skull. And it’s got like a cigarette hanging out of its teeth. Like the skull in the room is all.

Malformed and fucked up. So that it can appear. Exactly like a skull. In the image. That is reflected to your eye. And. It’s going to be in a rich person’s home. Six months from now. And. I’m never going to see it again. But. It was perfect. In that sense. For the day.

It was perfect. Did you think. Like. Aside from the optical illusion. And the spectacle. Did you think there was anything. Artful about it. Was it emotionally. Invocative. It wasn’t very. Emotionally charged. No. It was kind of like. Badass dad artwork. It was like. Yeah.

I got one of these. In my house. What have you got? That was pretty funny. It was a flat painting huh? That’s pretty funny. Let’s see you at the yacht club. Yeah. Like. I think. I was like. I don’t want to look at it. Because I’m like. Op art. As a concept. It’s been done. It’s not even. It’s just been done. Like. It just. I don’t know.

It just bothers me. I don’t know whether it’s unfair. I’m just like. It’s tacky. Yeah. That seems. It’s stupid. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe. It feels very. When did that shit. When was that popping off? Like 70s. 80s. 60s. Yeah. Where it’s like. It makes your eyes feel weird. Anyway. The thing I was manically. Trying to scroll for. Was. When I was in.

I was in. Malaysia. A couple years ago. They have this museum. Called the trick art museum. And you were calling like. The mirror and the skull. A trick. Yeah. But basically. This is a whole set of. Interactive exhibits. Where you and your mates. And your family. And your partner. Can like.

Participate in these staged photographs. And then. Like. Once you’ve taken the photographs. They’ll all be like. Optical illusions. Like it’ll look like. You’re running upside down. Or you’re lifting like. Heaps of weight. And stuff. It’s a whole museum. Called like. The trick art museum. Sounds like fun.

Yeah. Yeah. It was pretty fun. It was pretty fun. My sister. I think she thought it was like. Going to be magic tricks. Like. You were the magic trick. You’re the trick. Yeah. So it was kind of giving me that. And I like to use the word. Like trick. Yeah. Because I do definitely think like. I was kind of being stupid with like. Did the mirror have like. Emotional valence.

But like. The trick. Like the optical trick. And it’s a bit of like. A techie. Artwork in a way. But yeah. No. That is definitely. It’s a bit like. Of a nerdy artwork. Yeah. If you like. Like if you actually fuck with it. Yeah. Right. But. Yeah. It’s cool. And like. That’s like. Why I was saying. Was kind of perfect.

In the sense of like. Trump getting elected. Like. I didn’t want that to happen. But it was like. Like. Just narratively. It made the most sense. For the next. Craziest thing. That could possibly happen. True. And like. This work today. Was like. Was like. Of course. They’ve got a room. With like. A fun like. Visual thing. As like. A break. From like.

Looking at tons and tons of paintings. Yeah. Because I was walking around. With my like. Cute little analog camera strap to me. I’m thinking like. Where are all the photographers? Still. Very very few photographers. And the ones that there are. They’re like. I’ve got to paint on this frame. To make it like. Let me set you up. To talk about those works. Do you remember the. Do you know the three artists? Yeah. Let me get it back.

Julie Rapp and. And Pat Bassington. Yeah. Bassington. Yeah. Yeah. I’m a. Matt’s going to tell you about these works. But they were really cool. Two Pat.

Last name pending. Pat Bassington. Pat Bassington photos. And a Julie Rapp. Beautiful. Life-size nude. Like. Painting and photograph. But. The. Like. Gallery space. They were in. It was just those three works. And it was like. In an alley. It was awesome.

It was like. The two smaller works. On the left and right wall. And. The life-size Julie Rapp. On the back wall. And like. Really. If there were two people. Back to back. Looking at both the. Uh. Brassing tins. You would have been like. Touching backs. You would have been. Yeah. Touching butts. And I loved that. Like it was like.

I don’t know. Amongst all the like. It just felt really intentional. And really artful. And it wasn’t a money constraint. Because those are big artists. Yeah. And the works were pretty expensive. Yeah. It was very much like. It almost felt like a joke. Yeah. It was like. Amongst all these like. Yeah. This big open space. With like. Paintings on paintings on paintings. Yeah. Huge paintings. It’s like. These are like. Pretty impressive works.

And they’re not like. Little. It wasn’t the scale of the works. But it was like. We’re going to put them in this little. Nook. That you kind of have to like. And it kind of like. Narrowed. And enclosed. Like if you were standing in there. All you could see was the. Julie Rapp. That’s right. You’re completely. True. Closed off. And narrowed. Like funneled towards it. Which was like. Cool.

Like in this. Space. Where. I would say. The art experience. Is not. Primary. It’s very much like. We were kind of like. Laughing. We’re like. What’s the artwork viewing room. And we like. Tried to get in there. And it’s like. No bro. Like this is for like. People that have just bought a work. Yeah. But I think. He said that for like. The 50th time. Yeah. It was like. It’s not a gallery.

But I think it was funny. Because we were kind of. Trying to hit this thing. Like it was a gallery. But really. It’s an artwork viewing room. Like. Yeah. It’s for purchasing. Yeah. But like this. Little one. Felt like. The artist. Just couldn’t help themselves. But make a little gallery. We have to kind of make it like. Good to. Yeah. Perceive. Yeah. The way we do that. Is like. Block out all this bullshit.

So it’s just you and the work. And maybe. On the cheap too. Yeah. True. Right. Like you get like. Only like. 200 bucks. Instead of 2,000 bucks. Exactly. Worth of rent. Yeah. Exactly. Which is. Like. And that’s genius. If they. Didn’t. Like. They didn’t need to save that money. Yeah. So. Hungup’s Thrifty Artist Award. Goes to. Pat Brisington. And Julie Rapp.

Congratulations. For their. For Julie’s 40k. Painting. Yeah. Yeah. It’s like. On the. On the actual. Label. It’s like. Like. 50k. No. 40k. Yeah. Well. We were thinking. Like. Was it 30k. And then they bumped it up to 40. Or like. Which way did they go? It’s literally got like. 90k. The aesthetic is like.

Wide out. Yeah. And replaced the three with a four. I’m going to put it. I’m going to put it on the story right now. It’s so funny. Yeah. What do you guys reckon? 30k or 40k? Or like. 90k.

Yeah. Damn. They’re like. It’s too late. The card’s already been printed. That’s actually that. Like. The dodgy four. Actually. Plays quite nicely. With our reading of like. It like. Ties into. The whole narrative. Oh yeah. It was 30k. Then they’re like. Fuck it. Just go. Like. Fuck it. We only paid. 500 bucks for the day. And they sold about five of them. Yeah. Yeah.

True. 200k. I guess they were prints in the end. Of course. Anyway. Can you speak. Speak on that for a little bit. I thought that was one of the most. Like. Moving. And like. Oh shit. Like. Fucking get that in your face. Works in the whole. Yeah. It’s stunning. Yeah. It’s fucking stunning. So like. I’ll just describe it quickly.

It’s like. The central. Figure in this image. Is. Yeah. I think a life size. Like. Examination. Of a woman’s body. And it’s like. We’re going. In. Sections. So it’s like. The left side of her face. And like. The right side of her face. And her arms. And then like. Her breasts. And then her like.

Belly. And then like. Her private parts. And then like. Legs. Done in. Each individual prints. That have been like. Laid on. In a kind of funny. Like. Jigsaw puzzle. Kind of way. Like it’s. The knees don’t quite match up. And then all around her. Is like. A red puddle. With a. White outline. And then. Blue.

Sort of puddles. Or sea. And then a. Darker. Like indigo. Or black. Border. And it’s just like. Black and white photos. With muted colors. And it’s just like. This really stunning. Like. And I should say. Just the expression. Is it the artist herself? I don’t know. But it’s like. It felt like a self-portrait. Yeah. It’s just this like. Funny quizzical.

Like. Knowing. Like. Maybe. Suspicious. Like. Measuring. Expression. Yeah. They have their. Head. Arms raised above their heads. Yeah. It does feel a bit like. Well. A play on. I don’t know. Like classical. Posing. You know. With the arms above the head. Like you gotta be able to see everything.

Like look how delicate I am. Yeah. But then like. She’s in complete control of the depiction. Yes. It’s like. I’m kind of measuring your body. And you’re measuring me back. Like. Yeah. There’s like. There’s tons of stuff going on here. Like. Yeah. We don’t really have time to get it. We don’t have time. All of it. And you have to fucking look at it. But it’s also like covered with. Just glass.

Right? Yes. It was behind a layer of glass. Yeah. Yeah. And just screwed to the wall. Like. No border. Yeah. You know. The no border was really interesting. Yeah. And then the big. Like squiggly paintings. Right? Like it was. Her body’s like. I guess. Bordered by. Yeah. Like these big. Broad brush strokes. On like the left and right.

Yeah. But the body takes up the whole vertical. Like limits of the frame. Yeah. Right. And the paintings like. Have their own sort of space. Yes. Side. Yes. Yeah. That’s a fucking. Like. Yeah. I don’t know. I don’t. I don’t really know what to say. But there’s a fucking. Really. Powerful. Like. Mutation. Of the photographic form. To just like.

Throw the painting in there. Makes it feel like. Yeah. Very like. Cartoon and drawy. And like. We’re fucking up. Both. Mediums. I loved it. Yeah. That was dope. Amazing. Yeah. Amazing. Any. Any closing thoughts? On this work? Yeah. Yeah. Just like the. Just like the. The artist’s like. Destruction of a body.

In this sense. And then like. Reconstruction. Like. It’s just a really like. Beautiful. And like. Kind of brave. Process. To put. One’s. Or one’s. Subject’s body. Through. And like. To wind up with something. That’s so whole. And like. Together. And beautiful. And like. Strong. At the end of it. Maybe even stronger than. Just seeing a picture of.

Someone nude. Like this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Really fucking cool. Yeah. She fucked up the nude. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Let’s do speed run. On the last two. On the Brassington’s. Oh no. On the other two. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You just have to trust us. That the Brassington’s were dope. Yeah. But I’m thinking. I’ll take. Well like.

And maybe a quick. Wonder down the halls. Of like. Realism. Yeah. But like. Sorry. Remind me the artist’s name. Of the still lives. I got it here. Uh. Ebony Truscott. Yeah. Ebony Truscott. Went hard. And like. Whatever.

About still lives. Like I’m not obsessed with them. Really. At all. I don’t really give a fuck about them. I don’t like them. I don’t hate them. But there was something. About. Them. Today. That drew me in. I think there was so much. Sheen. On the show. Like. You know. So much scale. So much catchy.

Catchy. Like it felt like I was like. Every fucking room. Was like the front. Page of like. Your Instagram. Carousel. It’s like. Put the front room in the gallery. Yeah. Put the big one bro. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And there was like. Heaps of that. And then I was like. Oh. Like. Some browns. And some blacks. So these are like. Maybe what. A dozen. Um.

Like. Muted. Nice. Small. Still lives. Yeah. With. You know. Like. Just very painterly. Classic. Composition. But they’re. You know. Contemporary still lives. And they’re totally sparse. Like. This one is just. A pot. A bowl. An egg. And a cork. Like. Those are the like.

Objects of the still life. We’re in like a kitchen. We’re on a bench. There’ll be like. A brick. A Tupperware container. Yeah. An asthma puffer. A pair of earplugs. And there was like. An Amazon Alexa. Yeah. Oh really. Yeah. That’s sick. But it wasn’t. It still had this great. Subtlety. And I guess like. There’s just something. Profound. And human. And historical. About.

You know. This still life. You know. The still life. The still life. The still life. Like. It’s the same. And it’s never ending. And it never has to end. But yeah. It felt to me. Like. In that moment. Like. Very soothing. Aesthetically. And like. Emotionally. And I was like. Drawn to them. And then. I was like. Looked at the like. Room sheet. And it’s like. Every single one sold.

Because. Yeah. They’re perfect. And I love that. They’re kind of like. A bit. Underhanded. In a sense. Because. Like. They’re very. Sellable. Like. Boring motherfucker. Could buy this. And then in my head. I’m like. But you actually have something. Like. Profoundly beautiful. And meaningful. Whether you know it or not. Yeah. Cool. Like. It’s like.

Masquerading as boring art. But it’s actually. Like. Profoundly quiet. It’s like. The fucking socialist. Realist art. Where they like. Drew a crack. In the fucking. In the middle. And it’s like. I’m hiding something. Yeah. In here. And like. This is the biggest. Like. Protest I can make. But it’s like. Hiding here. And y’all don’t even know it.

In plain sight. The state didn’t even know it. It was a beautiful. Like. Quietness. That I think we. We all really needed. In the middle of that. Fucking circus. And we’re already like. Pretty offline. I guess at the moment. Yeah. We’re like. Doing hippie. Hippie. We’re going full. Yeah. No internet. Yeah. Fucking bare feet. And then.

Girl beard. Kind of stuff. Yeah. I wanted to touch on. But not at all. But not at all. We give. We’re like. Hippie in mind. Never hippie in presentation. Never. We’re like. Always shower. Deeply opposed to the hippie aesthetic. Yeah. We always shower. I saw a couple hippies at the market today. And I was like. Trying to comprehend them. I was like. Is it.

Are you like this hippie? Are you that hippie? Yeah. It was cool. Yeah. It was weird. There was this kid in my high school. Mike. And he was real fucking trendy. And real hot. And everyone loved him. And one day at a party. He was like. I’m a hippie. Like. I really am. But if I dress like that. Like. Everyone would laugh at me. So I have to dress like this. Like a skateboarder.

Nice. Mike gets it. Mike gets it. Mike always be getting it. You know. He was like 14. And I was like. That was the first time I’d maybe come across that. Yeah. Like I just wore like Kmart clothes. And I was like. Oh man. Oh you can choose what you wear? Well not only that. But he was like. He was like. I’m like picked out clothes from until he was like. Yeah. 21. But he was like. 21. Damn.

Yeah bro. Way to sell yourself. Gotta save when you can man. If mommy’s going to Kmart. You know. Ask her to pick you up a new pair of chinos. They do be selling like some good shit there. Anyway. We’re not going to talk about Kmart. We’re not going to talk about Kmart. But yeah. It was the first time I was like. Oh shit. You can be like. You know. You can decide what you wear. No. Not you can decide what you wear. You’re missing the point.

It’s like. You can be cool by picking clothes that you choose. And not your mom. Matt. You’re a fucking idiot. It’s more like. Guilty. You can have the foresight to perceive what the culture. Like. I was like. Whoa. That’s a third dimension of like. Yeah. You can like. Yeah. Foresee how you might be perceived.

Yeah. If you do a certain thing. You can. You can run the simulation on an outfit. Yeah. Before you go out. You’re like. How are my friends going to think about this? Oh. I’m going to change these pants. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. And do we have anything to say about the. All right. So we fucking rolled up on Vincent Namajira. Yeah. Who had like a whole fucking series of like.

Queen. Piss takes. Yeah. Like anti-colonial. Chopped and fried. Yeah. Lizzie. And then like. Blackfellas. Oh. She’s in front of. Is that the one in front of Uluru? Yeah. Like yeah. Indigenous folk. And like the queen. And like depictions of. Whoever that fucking little annoying.

Child royal is. Yeah. Yeah. Prince. Young Prince Charles. Young Prince Charles. Just fucking making. Taking the piss. And we like rolled up. And we’re like. Oh shit. Yeah. She died. And like. Yeah. Man’s been working on this for like a year or plus. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because you kind of just knock those out yesterday.

Right. Fuck no. They were big. Yeah. Yeah. They were big. Yeah. Yeah. So good. So timely. Yeah. There was some really good stuff on the other wall behind as well. You know. Whatever. Yeah. Or shout out to Vincent. Fuck yeah. I fucked with that work. Yeah. Come on the pod. Vincent. Yeah. That would be cool.

That would be cool. Yeah. We’ll Skype you in or something.

Cool. Does that wrap it up? I mean. Do you have any closing thoughts? Yeah. Next time there’s an art fair. Don’t go to it. Don’t buy a ticket. Don’t buy a VIP ticket. Maybe you should go. Because maybe it’s really good for galleries and artists. Don’t go. Don’t go see art. Don’t buy art.

We need the collectors. Right. Listen to this podcast. Do we need the collectors? Anyway. Yeah. Yeah. We kind of do. Yeah. So we can like make fun of them. But like I’m pretty sure we want them. Yeah. Okay. It’s good. It’s good they have their playpen. That’s like their playpen. Yeah. If you have a rich collector in your life. Don’t tell them about this podcast. Where we make fun of them.

Behind their backs. Exactly. But do tell them about Sydney Contemporary. And tell them to pomp their money into it. Tell them that you will think they’re inadequate. Unless they spend a lot of money in that shit. Yeah. Exactly. You won’t love them. And they’re not good patrons. And they’re not leveraging the most of their potential tax advantage assets.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. That’s the truth. And fucking tell one friend and one friend only about this podcast. Yeah. None of those two friends. Two. Two. Tell. No. Your closest friend. Yeah. Yeah. And like smartest friend. You gotta save it up. Like save up a little pitch. And then sit your friend down and be like listen. I’ve noticed that you’ve been really sad recently.

Yeah. And that your art career is going nowhere. Fast. Yeah. And I’ve got this great podcast for you. And it’s called Hung Up. And go to their Instagram and click on the link in the bio. Oh yeah. Alright. My friend. It’s been so good. Uh. Yep. That’s it. Alright. Speak soon. Okay. Bye. Laters. We’ll be right back.

We’ll be right back.

Show notes

In this latest pod ep, we covered @sydneycontemporary fairly and honestly. Artists mentioned @julierrap Vincent Namatjira (see @thisisnofantasy) and @ebony_truscott  Thanks for listening!